Paw Print Of Optimism

Dear Dog Lady,

I’m at a dicey time in my life. At 44, I’ve been “down-sized” from my high tech job and been out of work for six months. To make ends meet, I’ve had to move in with a roommate who is another laid-off worker -- from the financial services field. She rents half of a house, which I’m sharing and paying half the rent. Because she lived there first, she’s spread her stuff all over the place. I’m quarantined to a small room.

Not only must I contend with her, but also I have to live with her dog, a large poodle named Jim (by the way, I’ve always thought it odd when people give their dogs real human names). She lets Jim wander freely around the house and the other day, when I was out, I came back to find Jim lounging on my bed. My roommate was home at the time but hadn’t bothered to check up on the dog’s whereabouts.

Initially, I was appalled when I saw Jim on my bed and I shooed him away. But after he wandered off, I had the strangest feeling of desolation. I realized I was touched the dog had chosen my bed for a catnap. Now, I leave my door open for Jim and am disappointed when he doesn’t come in for a visit. I never much cared for dogs before. What’s happening to me?

Royce, Dallas, TX

Royce, rejoice. You’re realizing at a time in your life when you feel the most deflated; there are unexpected beacons to light your way. Dog Lady imagines your humiliation with no job and no home of your own. Yet, Jim has somehow shown you in his own unprejudiced dog-like way, that you have a glimmer of possibilities for change. That the dog has a human name is somehow symbolic.

Continue to leave your door open for Jim. You might want to keep a stash of treats (freeze-dried liver chunks are heavenly manna to dogs) in your room so he learns you’re not going to shoo him away but reward him for his incursions. Enjoy the attention as you get back on your feet. Your kindness toward Jim might move your roommate to allow you more run of the house. And who knows what else? Feeling those first stirrings of healing – as you’ve felt toward Jim – is the start of something bigger to come.

Posted by Dog Lady at November 24, 2003 02:51 PM