Canine harassment

Dear Dog Lady,

I’ve endured a recent rash of canine harassment. In two separate incidents, guys have mocked my dog, a Bichon Frise named Brunhilde. My dog is small, white and cream puff adorable. She doesn’t deserve to be ridiculed, although admittedly she doesn’t know it’s happening, but I get offended for both of us.

The first instance occurred this summer in the small Maine town where I vacation. I pulled up to the general store, where a group of locals surrounded by their Labrador and Golden retrievers, were hanging out on the porch drinking coffee. I left Brunhilde in the car while I went in to pick up the newspaper. When I came out, one of the men pointed to Brunhilde, who sitting up in the passenger seat, minding her own business. “Hey,” he called out, “we want to know if that’s a real dog.” They all burst out laughing. Hardy, har har. I grit my teeth and smiled: “Yeah, she’s real.” Seems the funnyman wasn’t finished: “That dog looks like a stuffed animal.” “Thank you,” I said. “I’ll take that as a compliment.” I pulled out of the parking lot seething.

Then, last week, I was walking Brunhilde. We were preparing to cross the street when a van from the Plymouth County Sheriff’s office pulled into the crosswalk and stopped for the light. I motioned to the driver to back up out of the crosswalk and he did. We crossed in front of them and as we’re stepping up to the curb, the guy in the passenger seat rolls down his window and says with a smirk: “We wouldn’t mind backing up for a real dog.” Again, I managed a weak retort, but, geez, push my buttons, buster!

Dog Lady, is this an insecure male problem? Something about size? How should I respond to these annoying remarks?

Marta, Burlington, MA.

Marta, be smarta. Ever hear of the birds and the bees? My guess is that these men were not harassing Brunhilde, they were toying with you. They were playfully teasing and having some fun because they think you’re as cute as your dog.

Sure, it’s a confident guy who steps out proudly with a frou-frou Bichon. Dog Lady knows of such a man, a powerful Massachusetts legislator who’s a newlywed. He walks his bride’s fluffy Stogie with pride. But let’s save the issue of small dogs/big dogs for another time. Anyway, it’s a guy thing.

The men who hooted at Brunhilde were whistling at you. Those Mainers were doubtless intrigued to see a new girl in town. They were razzing your pet to give you a little flirty hazing. And the Plymouth County sheriffs were probably embarrassed when you chided them for hogging the crosswalk. They sassed back by trifling with you through your dog.

Play with it, Marta, and enjoy -- especially if you’re a woman of a certain age. The next time some guy hoots something about Brunhilde not being a “real dog” sweetly smile and purr: “She may not look real to you but she’s plenty real to me.’’

Posted by Dog Lady at February 21, 2003 12:00 PM