Freedom Poodle

Dear Dog Lady,

I sense unease between my new boyfriend (a retired rear admiral) and my miniature French poodle, Peewee (child of a previous marriage). The admiral has begun to refer to Peewee as “freedom poodle.” He is suggesting that Peewee get a crew cut because he claims he’s seen other “freedom poodles” with close crops. The buzz-cut issue I can handle, but “freedom poodle” is beginning to wear me down. What does this say about my budding alliance with the rear admiral?

Ellen, Massachusetts

Ellen, there’s no tellin’. Doesn’t say much -- except why is the jaunty retired officer called a “rear” admiral? Dog Lady wonders about these military designations, although certainly we’ve all been bombarded with them lately. And, look at it this way, at least the rear admiral is not referring to Peewee as "collateral damage."

It sounds as if the rear admiral is nervous. He strains to float the love boat. He’s either teasing and flirting with you as best he can -- or he’s feeling a mite threatened by your affection for Peewee, the canine child of your previous marriage. So he’s seized on the current anti-Gallic sentiment to vent his anxiety. But there’s something else going on.

You must be uneasy in general about your relationship with the rear admiral-- or you would have been able to turn this whole “freedom poodle” thing into playful banter instead of a matter for suspicion. It would help if you stopped the rear admiral in his tracks the next time he makes a crack about Peewee’s pedigree, or haircut and talk to him about larger global issues that relate more to the two of you than to your dog. Don’t keep silent and stew like poulet in a pot. Communication is good. It stops wars.

Posted by Dog Lady at April 4, 2003 06:45 PM