Dobie Do Right

Dear Dog Lady,

My husband and I just had a baby. Naturally, Cody, the red Doberman we’ve had since he was six months old, has gone through some stress and changes. I also have four stepchildren who don’t live with us but visit us.

Lately, I’ve been feeling very bad about Cody because the kids don’t take care of him or pay as much attention to him as they used to. The only way he gets fed or let out is when I do it (or when I yell). I have been threatening for three months now to get rid of Cody because he poops in the house, barks at nothing and wakes the baby up. No one ever bathes him anymore until I complain long enough about it.

The poor thing must be miserable and feel unloved. I do love the dog but I feel that our home is not the best situation for him anymore. We both also work full time and are not home very often. My youngest stepson is so attached to Cody but yet he doesn’t always take care of him when he comes over to visit until I threaten to get rid of him and he changes his tune temporarily.

My question is, what are your thoughts about finding a better home for Cody? I feel that he deserves a home where kids are going to play with him, take him for walks, feed him and let him out without yelling at him.

Jill, Columbus, OH

Jill, yes, your dog deserves better – as do all dogs who don’t ask for anything except to be fed, exercised, and tended responsibly. This is our pact with our animals if we choose to take them into our homes.

Dog Lady compliments you for understanding how you’re failing your dog. You know Cody must be miserable and certainly the dog is telling you by pooping in the house and barking. If he were a contented dog, he wouldn’t be acting out chaotically. Your dog must also be aware he’s become a burden in the household. Dogs are sensitive creatures and keenly keyed in to the human moods around them.

I urge you to sit down calmly with your family, including Cody, and talk about your concern and your instinct to find the dog a safer home – not a better home, nor a happier home, but a safer home where Cody can feel some measure of tranquility beyond the yelling.

Find no fault. Assign no blame. Nobody’s guilty here. Life changes. Your household has been rocked by the birth of your daughter. She’s your first responsibility. Unfortunately, Cody has fallen through the cracks.

Dog Lady, ever the optimist, wishes she could convince you to re-dedicate yourself to your dog. You could take the dog and baby on long walks before or after work, which will do wonders for body and soul – Cody’s and yours. I sense, however, you have already decided what you must do.

Giving up a dog you’ve had since puppyhood will be traumatic if you don’t handle it in the best way possible. Make it a family project to find the dog a more attentive home. Involve your stepson. Tell him that the best thing he can do for Cody is to find a new adoptive family.

Go online and search out the local Doberman rescue organization. Breed rescue groups work wonders in finding new homes for dogs. Also, you can be assured that anyone in the Dobie group really cares about Dobermans.

Don’t just place the dog willy-nilly. Be responsible to Cody and send him off with peace and loving wishes. Your whole family will feel good to know, at the end, you found the best possible situation for your dog.

Posted by Dog Lady at June 28, 2004 10:59 AM