The Dog Lover's Resilient Heart

Dear Dog Lady,

I want to get a dog but I don’t think I could stand the heartbreak. I watched helplessly as a friend recently put down her 11-year-old dog Truffle. Truffle was in the advanced stages of bone cancer. My friend was inconsolable after Truffle died. A month later, she’s still a mess whenever she sees a dog.

Before the Truffle tragedy, I had been seriously considering getting a dog. I had decided to adopt from a shelter. When I saw my friend’s disassembly after Truffle died, I am reconsidering the whole thing. How do I reconcile getting an older dog while knowing I may outlive my pet?

Harry, Canton, MA

Harry, don’t be wary of letting a dog into your life. Your instinct to adopt a shelter dog is marvelous and love affirming. You can’t shy away from it just because you fear the natural course of time. No matter whether you outlast your animal or vice versa, both you and your dog will have a better quality of life for all the rest of your natural days.

Your friend who lost Truffle has been through an ordeal that we pet lovers know is the greatest sadness of dog guardians -- letting the dog go. But, as Woody Allen once observed in his classic film “Annie Hall”: “The heart is a very resilient muscle.” Your friend will eventually recover. Her pet-loving spirit will be elastic enough to allow another animal into her life. The love she had for Truffle will make that possible. Over time, she will learn how to put her late dog’s memory into a special chamber of her resilient heart and move on.

Posted by Dog Lady at April 9, 2004 10:17 AM